About "what men want"

In the heated debate on poledance and polefitness I often come across arguments that goes kinda like this:

"Ultimately, poledance was made for men because men find it sexy and seductive, and it turns them on."

- And therefore it's degrading towards women (optional: and I would never let my daughter do it).
I don't think I really need to explain this argument, but I can't help but wonder: is poledance really degrading towards women and feminism?

I like to ask the question "why does everything have to do with what men want and what men like?".
If men are turned on by poledancing, women shouldn't do it? What if men get turned on by women playing sand-volleyball, they shouldn't do that too? So, if men are turned on by boobs, we shouldn't be wearing deep necklines? Or if men are turned on by women in general, we shouldn't be allowed to be out in public? Because that's what this all boils down to, right? What turns men on?
We've been through this over and over again. Men get turned on by a lot of things! It's in their nature for gods sake, but women can't stop living their lives because men may or may not like their looks or what they do.
So, are you really suggesting that I shouldn't poledance because men likes it? Isn't that degrading? Doesn't that stop me from living my life the way I want to?

And then it's us. What women want, and what women like. I like poledance. I want to poledance. Not because my boyfriend wants me to, or because I feel a pressure to be sexy and satisfying to men. I do it for me. Because I want to. Because I think it's fun. Because it's my idea of a fun, yet effective workout. Is that so hard to understand? Could you open up your mind just enough to believe that I actually want this? That it's not about pleasing men, but pleasing myself?

The truth is, whatever I think, and whatever men think, poledance can be both an uplift and it can be degrading. The same goes with body-types, clothing, hair-styles, sex, hobbies, carrier or whatever. The problem isn't the things we do or if men get turned on by it or not. What's degrading towards women is when our situation forces us to do things we don't wanna do, or if we feel pressured to do things in order to please others rather than ourselves.

And you'll never be able to please everybody anyway

I don't think poledancing is degrading. I think it's great that those who want to do it do it, and I think it's great that those who don't want to just don't. And I think it's about time that we do the things we want to do for ourselves, and respect each other for the choices we make. You, me, men and women.